


no one else can heal your wounds

by gracezodiac



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Hand Jobs, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Snoke Being a Dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 09:06:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8199377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gracezodiac/pseuds/gracezodiac
Summary: An injured Kylo drags himself to Hux's quarters after being punished by Snoke. Hux takes care of him in the only way he knows how.





	

**Author's Note:**

> hello everyone! 
> 
> warnings for this fic: mentions of violence, emotional manipulation and abuse (from snoke), and a lot of reference to kylo being gaslighted by snoke
> 
> i had the idea for this ages ago and talked to mak about it, who told me i should go for it so here we are!
> 
> title taken from 'heal my wounds' by poets of the fall
> 
> please leave comments if you can i'd love to know what you think!
> 
> i hope you enjoy <3

Every step forward caused searing pain to shoot through his body, but Kylo forced himself to continue onwards. Graveyard shift was approaching, so the corridors of the Finalizer were on the most part, and much to his relief, empty. Any wandering officers paid him little attention, other than to speed up their pace when passing him. The mask was very good for intimidating officers, and right now it served to make sure they stayed out of his way, as well as hiding the tears that were spilling over his cheeks with each new wave of pain.

 

Snoke had been displeased, again. Ren had thought he'd done things right this time, but when he'd stood before him in the chamber, it was clear that he'd fallen far from the mark. _My apprentice_ , Snoke had started, his gaze as scrutinising as always, _you disappoint me_. The rest was somewhat of a blur, every nerve on fire as Snoke's fingers slid into his mind and began tearing it apart. He bore no physical wounds, other than the bruises on his knees that had occurred when he'd fallen to the floor, not expecting the intrusion to be so sudden. He hadn't even had chance to explain himself, before Snoke had began punishing him. But despite the absence of outwards injuries, the sheer ache in his body was excruciating, and he knew it would take at least a day to recover. It felt as though he'd been crushed, ripped apart, and hastily stitched back together into some grotesque impersonation of himself. It wasn't pleasant, but as horrible as he felt, he knew he deserved it.

 

He wanted to be better. He wanted to live up to the potential Snoke claimed he had. It hurt deeply that he was failing to become that. He'd have to meditate later, see if he could find the answers through the Force – after everything Snoke had done for him, he didn't want to continue to waste his time.

 

In his pained, upset haze, he hadn't been paying much attention to where he was going, only knowing that he needed to keep moving forward, but when he finally found himself outside Hux's quarters, exhausted and in copious amounts of pain, he couldn't say he was surprised. Usually he would have used the force to barge in, but he was in no fit state for that, and instead punched in the door code, unable to help the relief that washed over him as he laid eyes on Hux once the doors had slid open. He was sat at his desk, data-pad in hand and focused on some sort of report, but his gaze shifted towards the door as it opened. Ren stepped into the room, wincing behind the mask. Hux's eyes never left him, and stayed perfectly silent, waiting for some sort of explanation as to why the Knight was standing in the doorway to his quarters. But Ren didn't have it in him to speak at that moment; instead he reached up and took off his helmet, wasting no time in discarding it to one side and taking deep, shaky breaths. He knew he looked a mess, tears still damp on his face, but he knew Hux would be able to deal with this.

 

He always could.

 

Hux stared at him a few moments longer, taking in his appearance, before putting down his data-pad and walking over to him. Kylo dropped to his knees without thinking, ignoring the white flash of pain and letting his head rest against Hux's thigh. He was so tired, so weak, he just needed some contact so he could recover, anything Hux was willing to give him. Snoke would be even more disappointed, if he could see him now, but as desperate as Ren was to please his master, he knew how much he needed Hux to help him recover

 

There was a small tug on his hair and he glanced up to find Hux looking at him, not bothering to hide his concern. “Snoke?” He asked, and Ren nodded, still not trusting his voice. He didn't say anything, but anger started to roll off Hux in waves, and Ren leaned further into him, not wanting him to be angry. It was okay, he deserved this, Snoke wouldn't do something if it wasn't for his own good. He'd become stronger after this, he was being pathetic right now, and he'd regret it later when he wasn't in so much pain, but despite his cold exterior, Hux could be extraordinarily gentle, and Kylo wanted, he needed that so badly. He'd started to crave the tender caresses just as much as the pain these days.

 

“Here,” Hux offered his hand to him and Ren stood up and took it, holding on tightly, “come with me.”

 

Ren found himself being led further back into Hux's rooms, drawing to a halt in front of his bed. Then, methodically, Hux began to take off the various layers Ren was wearing, carefully man-handling him to lift his arms so they could slide off easier. Ren let it happen without complaint, happy to have someone else in control. It ended up being quite relaxing, the way Hux's hands glided over him, removing each piece of fabric. And it was his hands, much to Ren's delight, Hux wasn't wearing his gloves that night. He had such beautiful hands, Ren knew he had a slight fixation with them – they were slender, seemingly delicate, yet Ren knew that Hux wasn't afraid to get them dirty, that he'd killed many a person with his hands, blood caked under his nails and not a single drop of remorse in sight. It always amazed Kylo how deadly someone who seemed so fragile could be.

 

Once he was down to his leggings and nothing else, Hux began to circle him, giving him a clinical look over. The longer it went on, the more nervous Kylo became, and started to wonder if he should just leave. He tried not to squirm uncomfortably, but he must have given something away because Hux withdrew, moving to stand in front of him and cup his face, tilting it from side to side.

 

“Concussion?” He asked, concern still evident on his face. Ren shook his head and Hux hummed back in response, keeping his gaze for a little longer, just to check. He seemed satisfied after a while and took Ren's hand in his own, guiding him to sit up on the bed. The sheets were soft beneath him, and Ren bunched them up in his hands, savouring the feeling. Silk had always felt so smooth against his skin, it was one of the reasons they always had their 'meetings' in Hux's quarters and not his own. That and the fact that Hux had to be in control of everything.

 

The man in question also climbed onto the bed after Ren, settling in his lap. He was sat sideways, his legs hanging off to one side, and he wrapped an arm around Ren's shoulders to keep himself steady. His other hand cupped Ren's face, turning it towards Hux's own, so they could look at each other.

 

“What did he do to you?” Hux asked quietly, rubbing his thumb across Kylo's cheek. It made Ren's chest ache, the sheer fondness of it, and he leant into the touch, making a soft noise of content.

 

“Went in my mind, made me hurt. I wasn't good enough, I deserved it.”

 

Hux tutted, and Ren tried to look away, not wanting to see more disappointment, but Hux wouldn't let him, fingers firmly keeping Ren's head in place. Begrudgingly, Kylo's eyes flickered back up to Hux, who was staring at him intensely, but with a gentleness. “You didn't deserve this,” he spoke slowly, “what he does to you is disgraceful. He doesn't understand just how great your worth is.”

 

“Hux-” He started, wanting to disagree, but Hux interrupted him again.

 

“No, let me finish. You're magnificent. You don't realise it, do you? You don't know what you look like when you interrogate people, when you storm across a battlefield and cut down people in your path. You have so much power at your fingertips, you are capable of so much bloodshed and destruction. Kylo...” Hux purred, whispering into his ear, “You're beautiful.”

 

A shiver ran down his neck, and he let his eyes flutter shut at Hux's words. He wanted to believe it so badly, he wanted to be the person Hux said he was, but there was no way it was true. He was a failure, he was still too attached to the light, he could never be what they wanted him to be.

 

“I'm not good, I don't... I... I'm not...”

 

“Yes you are. You're breath-taking. Snoke doesn't see you for how valuable you are, he wastes your talents. You _are_ good enough Kylo, you're so very good.”

 

Hux pulled back from his ear to tilt Ren's chin up with his finger, so Hux could lean forward and kiss him. Ren whined quietly, kissing him back and revelling in the way Hux took his lower lip into his mouth and bit down gently. Just as he was starting to get worked up, Hux pulled back, smirking at the way Ren let out a soft moan as his eyes slowly opened again. They were completely dark, and somewhere along the line he'd become very, very hard.

 

“Let me show you how good you are.” Hux offered, moving his hand from Ren's face down his chest, ghosting over his nipple. Ren inhaled sharply, his head falling to one side. Immediately, Hux leant forward to press his lips against his neck, whilst his hand travelled further down. “Please...” Ren begged, letting out a soft groan as Hux cupped him through his leggings.

 

“That's it...” Hux cooed, rubbing gently. He glanced briefly down at Ren's chest, delighted in the way it moved in accordance to his breathing, which was slowly becoming more laboured, the more Hux touched him. Satisfied, Hux turned his attentions back to Ren's neck, sucking at the skin and marking it, mainly to hear the noises that came from it, but also in a possessive 'fuck you' to Snoke. Ren was _his_. And he would guarantee that by the time he was Emperor. Kylo lived to serve, he needed the guidance, he needed to be given orders. Snoke didn't fully understand just exactly the potential hidden within Kylo, but Hux did. Hux could see him for what he was: powerful, magnificent-

 

Deadly.

 

Hux would take far better care of him than Snoke ever could. And on a more personal level, that Hux wasn't ready to admit to, he cared deeply about Ren. Snoke was killing him, and he couldn't stand by and keep watching it happen. But he needed to patient, his plan would come together soon enough. They'd overthrow Snoke and have the galaxy for themselves.

 

“You're doing so well Kylo,” Hux murmured, nibbling at his ear and slipping his hand into Kylo's pants to touch him properly. When he pulled his cock free, Kylo's arms wrapped around him tightly and he let out a deep cry, trying to push up into the touch, but Hux's weight on top of him prevented that. The lights in Hux's quarters started to flicker and Hux smirked in delight. “So good Kylo... You feel so good, is this what you want?”

 

“Yes...” Kylo breathed, clutching to Hux as tightly as he could. It was almost overwhelming, and he wasn't even sure why, and yet Hux managed to do this to him every time – turn him into a wreck. He didn't deserve to feel this good, he was still a failure, but he wanted it so badly... Did that make him weak? Snoke had never specifically told him to stay away from desires like these, and yet... He felt as though he was breaking rules somewhere. Maybe that was why it was so alluring.

 

Hux captured his mouth again and kissed him deeply as he stroked Kylo faster. He could feel Kylo's hands come up to tug at his hair, something he could hold onto. Hux groaned at the pressure, his own cock pressing tightly against his trousers. He paid it little attention however, since this was all about making Kylo feel good. _You're gorgeous_ Hux projected, revelling in all the little whimpers, _look how good you are for me_.

 

Kylo wasn't sure how much longer he was going to last. Hux was saying all these things and he wanted to believe them so badly, wanted to believe he could be good enough. Dimly, he noted the flickering lights overhead, and realised it must be him causing that. When Hux pulled away to start pressing kisses along his jaw, Ren let little moans tumble over his lips.

 

“Hux... M'so close...”

 

“Oh Ren,” Hux murmured, before sucking another mark under his jaw, “be a good boy and come for me.”

 

Ren cried out, and a few strokes later he frantically grabbed at Hux as he came, stars appearing in his vision. The bulbs overhead shattered, glass falling down around them. Hux stroked him through it, pressing kisses to any patch of skin he could, and kept whispering about how wonderful he'd been and how proud of him he was. Ren slumped against him when he was done, truly exhausted, and Hux held him tightly, nuzzling into his hair.

 

They stayed like that for a while, catching their breath and holding onto each other. Ren, once he'd looked up again, became suddenly aware that Hux was still fully clothed and hadn't gotten off himself. He caught Hux's gaze, about to ask if he wanted him to reciprocate but Hux shook his head, before removing himself from his lap. _This was for you_ , he thought, and Ren felt his cheeks begin to burn.

 

Hux took his own clothes off, which were now stained with Ren's come, and dumped them in a laundry basket, before going back over and taking Ren's leggings and pants off, putting them with his own clothes. When he'd turned back, Ren had already slipped under the covers and looked close to falling asleep. Somewhere deep in his chest, Hux's heart thumped wildly.

 

When he slipped into the bed as well, Ren reached over and pulled him into an embrace, burying his head in his neck. Much to his delight, Hux returned it, tracing patterns on the skin of his back. _You were wonderful_ , Hux projected, and Ren tried not to get his hopes up at the praise, but failed dismally. Praise from Snoke had always made him feel good, but praise from Hux was better.

 

 _And you are more than good enough for me_.

 

Ren froze briefly, unsure of whether he'd heard him right. He didn't respond, too overwhelmed and too afraid that if he asked, Hux would deny it. Instead he settled into the embrace, fatigue creeping over him after everything he'd been through that day. Hux's hands made their way to his hair and began carding through the soft locks, gently soothing Kylo to sleep.

 

Just before he let himself drift off, he caught another one of Hux's thoughts, one that he wasn't sure he was supposed to hear.

 

_I'm going to kill him for doing this to you. I want his blood on my hands as I watch the light fade from his eyes and then we will take the galaxy for ourselves._

 

Ren let himself fall asleep, and pretended he hadn't heard.

 

**Author's Note:**

> why does everything i write end up with everyone going to sleep, i am not creative in the slightest
> 
> as always you can find me at [skywalkeraesthetics](http://www.skywalkeraesthetics.tumblr.com) on tumblr
> 
>  
> 
> (P.S. if anyone reads loyalties i want to apologise i am so so so sorry it's been over two months since the last update, i moved to uni during that time which has been incredibly stressful and i've really struggled with inspo for the story, i'm really unhappy with it. HOPEFULLY i'll get an update out before the 20th but we'll see! thank you so much for sticking around so far, and i'm sorry once again)


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